ok, so Emily told me that she told another one of our friends that were dating and might have sex... anyone else see somthing wrong with this picture? i told her it was ok, because the mutual friend is always hitting on Emily. oh well, we'll see how this turns out.
also, this last part is for Mark, sorry i havent posted any philosophy.
ignorance is bliss should be changed to ignorance can be bliss. if you look at it, children are happy because they dont know the things they imagine cant come true, ignorant of reality, but they are also scared of alot, like the dark. they dont know that that ninja there imagining cant just appear from the shadow in the corner of the room. they are also ignorant of reality, but this time, i wouldent say its blissfully, but quite horridly.
my sister and i are, well, for lack of a better word, gifted. i dont like that word because it implies the belief in a higher being, but thats besides the point. both of us are very mature mentally, but immature emotionally. we fit in better with adults in conversations, but better with younger kids when it comes to our emotions.
well i was talking to my sister, mainly about ignorance, and i asked her if she would rather be less mentally mature to be more blissful. she said no, but she also added that she wished that everyone else be brought up to our level. i agree with that.
i think this kind of relates to my smoking and drinking. i know i've said this before, and if you dont wana read, by all means dont because this is more to help me figure myself out, but i think i like drinking and smoking because i can feel normal. this isent a justification, if anything its a reason to stop, but i do like the feeling of normality. at my age, people really set a goal of ether fitting in, or standing out. i naturally stand out, but my appearance in the way i dress dosent. im trying to change that, but i dont think i can change my need for normality.
Peace!
And So It Goes (2014)
9 years ago
14 comments:
I think it is a shame that anyone would smoke and drink just because of peer pressure, to be considered 'normal' by their friends. That just indicates to me that a higher class of friends is needed. I would hope a 'gifted', more mentally mature, person would be more conscious of the negative health effects and in my opinion the stupidity of indulging in these bad habits.
when i said i need normality, i didnet mean because everyone else is doing it, i ment because when im... not myself, i dont feel like the whole world is inferior. i dont feel like i have to dumb myself down. i just am, and theres no thinking to that.
Peace
You've nailed the contradiction of adolescence beautifully here. Mentally mature, yet emotionally immature. Needing to fit in, yet wanting to be an individual. That's what gets me in, seeing how you guys navigate this minefield and emerge as the fine adults I'm sure you'll be.
A bit of chemical escapism can give a little welcome relief from your daily challenges. But ultimately you have to face up to the contradictions stone cold sober.
haha all i know is i wana be hellied off of this minefield =P and i do face the contradictions sober most of the time, but its nice to have a break from that from time to time.
Hi there, Spys
Thanks for thinking of me: it doesn't have to be philosophy - it's always interesting to find out how you're thinking.
You're right: ignorance can be bliss (there are many things I'd be happier not to know about), but sometimes knowledge is bliss too. How many teenagers would be much happier if puberty were explained to them properly before it starts happening? How many gay people would be happier to know that this is a natural state, and that they're not alone?
You've spotted an interesting twist in the English language: does a gift have to imply a giver?
Another thought on language: please be very careful with "normal". It carries a lot of dangerous implications - such as the one that anything else is "abnormal". If I find myself about to use it, I try to think whether another word, like "usual" or "typical", would express what I'm trying to say without the same implications. I'd be very unhappy with a sentence like "Being straight is normal", for example.
If I've understood it right, you're using "normal" to describe your smoking and drinking because it's about fitting in, conforming, with the people around you. Please say if I've got it wrong, because I think this is worth talking about more.
Take care
Mark
well the gift wouldent be called a gift if it was found or acquired by ones self.
you are right, i should watch the word normal, but usual has unusual, and typical has non-typical. there all basicaly the same in that sence.
plz take no offence to this, but you do have it wrong. normal in my thought patterns. when your drunk or hight, it dosent really matter about your iq, your all just dumb. its not as much about conforming as in doing what everyone else is doing, or says is right, its more about me not caring if i am superior to others or not, or not caring if they make a mistake.
Hi there, Spys
I take your point about unusual, non-typical and so on, but I would say that these words don't all have the same implications. "Non-typical" is neutral, I think; "unusual" can be quite positive - quirky and interesting. But "abnormal" always comes across as negative, to me at least. And, because they're linked to their opposites, "typical", "usual" and "normal" also have implications that are positive or negative.
Thanks for explaining more about the drinking and smoking. I'm not at all offended; if I were going to be, I probably wouldn't have asked the question. I'm trying to understand you, another human being, with a set of assumptions and thought processes that are different from mine. Sometimes all I can do is to come up with a theory, and test it by asking whether I've got it right - the scientific method in action. So getting it wrong usually means I've learnt something new and interesting :-)
Now I'm starting to think about what you've said here. I suspect I'll have to chew it over for a while - don't be too surprised if there's another comment here tomorrow!
Take care
Mark
true, most people do adapt different, for lack of a better word, emotions to different words that have the same definition, but by definition, they are almost identical.
no problem, and im glad your offended. i completly understand where your comming from.
im looking forward to the comment =)
Hi there, Spys
Well, it's later than I had hoped (it's been a busy few days), but here's the long-awaited comment. It may be a bit disjointed, since it's been written in pieces over several days, and it's also a lot longer than I expected. But here goes...
You've said that you're gifted, which I interpret as "highly intelligent" - is that right? You've also said that this makes you feel superior, a feeling that I guess you don't like because you switch it off from time to time with various types of chemical.
I think I understand where you're coming from, and it will become clearer if tell you some more about me and my life.
I am also in the "highly intelligent" group. I was always at or near the top in exams at school; when I went to university, it was to Cambridge - the British equivalent of Harvard or Princeton.
You may think this makes me sound big-headed or arrogant. I think, and hope, that is not so. Yes, academic work came, and still comes, very easily to me, or at least much more easily than to many other people. But I'm also well aware that this is just one of many human talents and abilities, a lot of which I don't share. I have little or no athletic ability, I don't play sports, I'm not musical, I struggle with things requiring originality or novelty.
At school, I was well aware that I was brighter than most of the people around me (including some of the teachers). I was also well aware that this made me different. I can't say that I actively hid this difference, but I certainly didn't show it off either. But then I was, and still am, something of a loner, and very often quite happy with just my own company. Things changed for my last two years of school. At that time, many people in Britain left school at age 16 - so those who stayed on were the more intelligent ones, who wanted to be there. So this was a much more encouraging atmosphere - I opened up more, and made some good friends. University was another step forward: an exhilarating time for me, with everyone around me my equal. Working life is different again: whilst the ability range is rather wider than at university, my analytical and problem-solving are appreciated. I don't show them off unnecessarily, but I do use them as well as I can when they're needed.
So, do I feel superior to other people? The answer is No, or at least not often. Sometimes there are situations where I can see that someone has not "got" something, and I can explain it; equally there are times when I'm frustrated by others' inability to understand and explain things. In any case, I've never felt the need to temporarily switch off bits of my brain or my feelings with chemicals (other than painkillers).
So where does this leave you? You seem to be uncomfortable about being more intelligent than the people around you. To me, intelligence seems to be very much like sexuality: it's an aspect of you that you can't change, and that marks you out as "different". So it's another part of you that you have to come to terms with and accept. Just as you said "im happy being gay, and it is who i am" in your most recent post, I would love to hear you say "im happy being bright, and it is who i am".
For the future: I don't know whether university is something you're thinking of, but I think you would find it a good place to be. Even if you don't go, I expect that once you're out of school, people will stop being worried about the fact that you're "different", and start being interested in how well you can think.
I hope that's given you something to think about, at least.
*hugs*
Mark
PS: the verification word was menta, which seemed highly appropriate as being so close to "mental".
haha finally, the much awaited comment!!!
yes, basically, a "gifted child" has a higher intelligence then most other kids his age, yet is underdeveloped in other areas (like emotionally). and true, i dont like my superiority to stand out all of the time.
wow congrats!!!
its funny how were quite similar. i prefer to be by myself as well. my mom always thinks im depressed because of it too. i crave that atmosphere, and hope to obtain it next year with honors genetics.
i wouldent say im uncomfortable with my intelligence, i just dont want it to socially hold me back, which it has done before. and the "chemical turn offs" are just a break. they make me remember that im not the best human out there. they also make me forget about my intelligence. im not blurting out random facts that i find interesting yet others mock for.
i dont know if this is one of thoes English to English mistranslations (haha wow... just wow...) but by university, do you mean going to college? if so, yes, i do plan on going to college, and even want to go to one closer to you, in Scotland. its American accredited, and i hate the American college life.
PS nice hahaha
Peace!!!
Hi there, Spys
*hugs*
I'm sorry to hear that you're in a place where others mock you for any reason, let alone one so innocent and natural as telling them about something that you've found interesting. But I guess that school is like that all too often :-(
I'm really saddened that you feel a need to "forget about [your] intelligence" from time to time. I don't think I ever got to that point: yes, I didn't make a show of it (I guess I learnt that fairly early on), but I think I found a niche where I could do my own thing without attracting unwelcome attention. I have a feeling, too, that the teachers were looking out for me.
I can well understand why you want out, and I hope the genetics course and its environment are everything you want and expect. In the meantime, is there any way you can find some friends who will at least treat you with more respect, and preferably share your enjoyment of random interesting things? Of course, you can always blog about this sort of things, or at least e-mail me (I enjoy random interesting things too!), but I'm sure that having some real world people to share this with would be good.
Hmmm... "school", "college" and "university": I think they have somewhat different meanings in the US and the UK. I'll explain a bit about the British education system to show how those words are used over here, and maybe you can match them up to the American system.
"School" is used exclusively for education up to age 18. Generally it's divided into primary school, up to age 11, and then secondary school (as a separate, larger institution) for age 11 - 18. There's nothing like American high school here, though some areas still have middle school covering age 9 - 13 or so.
"University" is used for academic institutions doing research, and teaching of mainly 3 and 4-year courses from age 18 upwards. Almost always these have "university" as part of their name. The teaching is usually academically inclined, and the result for the student is a degree, usually a bachelors (BA, BSc, BEng etc.), or a masters (MA, MSc, MEng) for a 4-year degree. I think these generally correspond to "university" as it's understood in America, though there's the confusion that Americans often use "school" informally to mean the same thing: "which school are you at?". This would not be understood by a British university student!
"College" can mean a lot of things over here, unfortunately. It's fairly safe to say that it's some sort of educational institution, but beyond that you usually need some context to work out what sort. Most often, a college provides practical or vocational training from age 16 upwards (i.e. in contrast to the academic approach of a university, though the distinction is a little blurred these days). But "college" also turns up in several other places: it's part of the name of some of England's oldest and most exclusive private schools, for example. And the component institutions at Oxford and Cambridge (and several other English universities) that provide accommodation, some of the teaching, and a definite sense of community, are colleges - for example I was at Churchill College when I was at Cambridge.
So it may be that we mean the same thing, but, for the Scottish one at least, I'd have to know which one it is. I'm certainly curious about where you're thinking of going - if you'd prefer not to publish the details here, I'd be very grateful if you could e-mail me.
Take care
Mark
Mark, i dont think much people would enjoy learning like i enjoy teaching. i always end up teaching my friends things about, well, anything, even there own religion. one of my catholic friends knows very little about his church, yet is very faithful. i teach him things from time to time. not about how i dont like the church, but about the history of the church, and a little about the bible. he understands i know alot, but when i blurt out random facts about, well, anything but the church, its a "guess what, i dont care."
"school" normaly means a teaching astablishment. for our school, we use grades. so kindergarden (or pre-kindergarden(pre-k)) to 5th grade is lower school. 6th-8th grade is middle school. 9th-12th grade is high school. some schools have k-12th grade, but most dont. if you go to a public school, its typical to go to a lower school, a different middle school, and then a different high school as well. for me, i went to a privet school. so i stayed in one school from k-8th grade, but then went to another privet school for high school.
"university" is a term given to colleges that meat a cretin predetermined criteria. i personally dont know what it is, but universities are looked upon with more prestige.
"college" is a school for people who have graduated high school. normal 3-5 years. you can get your bachelors, minors, majors, and somtimes more from colleges.
i really dont know how else to explain them haha. sorry.
and im really just looking. when/if i decide i really do want to go there, ill shoot you an email.
Peace
Hi there, Spys
Apologies for not replying to your last comment earlier - yesterday turned out to be busier than I expected.
I think it might be time to switch this discussion to e-mail - it seems to be just the two of us here now, and the original post has now fallen off the front page of your blog.
Before I stop here, though, I think it would be good to round off the school/university/college definition thing. Thanks for taking the time to explain the American system - it's made it a lot clearer for me. It sounds to me as if the British use of "university" would cover both "university" and probably most colleges in America.
E-mail coming shortly, I hope.
Take care
Mark
haha cant wait for the email. Peace
Post a Comment