Philosophies From A Kid

ok, so i dont know how much ill be able to post like this. im having a good time at the beach. im gettin a tan too yay haha. i dont have much to say now because of my lack of time. sorry, i got to go now, but i AM still alive =)

Peace!!!

ok, so i was up late last night thinking, and talking to Emily. she was complaining about boys until i bothered her with my troubles. i figured out last night that i can never really come out. i never want my parents to know, especial my mom, and most of my friends would never talk to me again. it would suck. she said life with 3 real friends (the 3 people outside my family that know) would be better than a life full of fake friends. i see what she's saying, but i dont want a day of my life to be spent with just 3 friends. yea, i would open the door wider to the posibility of finding a guy, but i would completly shut all of the other doors.

i also realized that the disapointment i would bring my mom is alot different then most kids. mine would never go away. most peoples are one choice, mines a lifestyle. i hope she never finds out.

Peace!

PS im goin to the beach tomorrow, so ill try and get one more post in tonight, but idk if that will happen. idk if ill be able to get on the internet at the beach, its always touchy, so ill try and do some posts from my phone if i cant get on a computer

most moms are disapointed cuz of a choice (like drunk driving or detention at school), mine is because of somthin i dident choose; my sexuality. Peace

haha hey guys, the internets up for now so ill post before its down again.

so ill start with the family trip thing. my mom, sister, and i went to a resturant that was an hour away to meet my moms side of the family, the side i HATE. the ride was fine. not too long which was nice.

we get there, walk in, and theres the 13 family members. it was so overwhelming. my sister and i stayed in the back and only talked to a few of them.

then we sat down. this was a nice resturant so i had to wear a dress shirt and stuff. (yes, that was random). i ordered some mussle pasta thing. it was realy good. it was kinda awkward though cuz there were naked women everywhere in this place, and some of my cousins are young.

after dinner, we left, and stayed at my uncles. my sister, mother, aunt, uncle, cousin, and another aunt had a long discusion. the one aunt is a lesbion, and the other aunt is married to the uncle, with the cousin as there daughter. well all i can say is i HATE my lesbian aunt even more now. she is so stong headed, and flat out disrespectful.

my sister and i think alot of the same things, and no one our ages understands us, and even some adults dont. so the lesbian just sat there and laughed at my sisters and i thoughts and oppinions. she is a BITCH!!!

anyway, we woke up on fathers day and had breakfast. it was good.

so no, i dident get a card for my mom because were celibrating her birthday when were at the beach next week. and no, i dident get my dad a card because i dident even see him on fathers day.


thats really the only thing i have to post about for now. if somthing happens ill post it. Peace!!!

hey guys, sorry my internets been down. ill post when i can. Peace!

im at a relitives house cuz of a family trip. the whole family was there. fml. but its my moms b day tomorrow. Peace!

ok, so i told my sister i like guys today.

well my dad actoualy was alot longer haha

i woke up to my sister yelling at me to tell her what time we were goin to lunch at. i woke up and told her. then i got ready for lunch. me sister and i went out to eat with my dad. it was good. i <3 cheese steak subs.

then my sister and i went shopping. we went to the dollar store first. we were walking down one isle and i told her how my mom told me she would have been disapointed if i was gay. my sister told me that it was crazy she said that, and that it wasent right, and that if i was, she'd suport me. i said really? when she said it wasent right (sarcasm), and another woman in that isle said really, thats bad. she was right haha

then we went to Old Navy and i got 2 pairs of cargo shorts and a collered shirt for $42. then my sister droped me off at home and went to work.

my internet was down, so i couldent get your advice, but i asked Emily and Celie if i should tell my sister i like guys. they said yes, with cautions like make sure she dosent tell your parents and such.

so i texted my sister. no responce. i freeked out and texted Emily.

then i texted my sister and said somthing like "sorry if that was awkward, i trust you wont tell mom or dad." she replies "um?"

i thought she was ashamed. i balled my eyes out. thank God (fake) for Emily and Celie for comforting me through that.

then i texted my sister and said "just dont tell mom or dad. thanks for the suport sis."

then she goes "tell them what?"

she never got my first text telling her i like guys... FML!!!

so i tell her, and she says she dosent care. i was so relieved!

then i went to drivers ed, and now im home.

i might hang out with Megan tonight. she wants to try a black and mild. that would be cool.

Peace!

just had my first bad expirence coming out... and it was my sister. she said she would have suported me... instead she replys with a text "um?"